PollokBlog

Saturday Evening Prayer

I spoke to Liza tonight on the phone three times, the last of which included some time with her and each of the kids. 

The same nurse as last night is caring for Liza again tonight. Hopefully - this is our prayer - tonight will be just as good as last night. Sleep is really important to healing. Last night was a gift and an answered prayer, but it is still only a small part of the whole. 

The rest of today made it clear that the cause of Liza's pain is still raging under the medications. In fact, she awoke from a midday nap in great pain today. The great teams there are treating her pain, but that is really all they're doing right now. Again, it seems we must continue to search some of the other leads (cysts, ear leak, etc.) to find the root of the pain problem. The extremely delicate balance and timing of even the best pain management so far is further evidence of the persevering problem. So unfortunately, even after a few blessings like sleep, Liza is not "fixed." Instead of checkers, that seems to be a more complex chess board. But we are moving some pieces. 

The blood patch yesterday afternoon will continue to do its work on Liza's spinal column and thecal sac. We pray it does more than we even expect. We also heard back today from the rheumatology blood tests from Dr. Yousefi. Liza did not test positive for any of the connective tissue disorders that they tested for - yet another very good thing. And another piece of the ongoing puzzle. 

Praying for a good night of deep, healing rest for Liza. Thank you all for praying with us. 

Some personal thoughts: 
For the past many days in the hospital room, my time in God's Word has been inconsistent and interrupted. At the same time I have discovered a new depth and desperation in my prayers to Him - My Father. I have also embraced a new sweetness of gratitude at times. I am close to tears most of the day, but the reason is not always the same.

As God would have it, as I return to my Psalms reading, I am approaching the mid 50's, where there is a collection of poignant and desperate songs of David. They have been some of my most cherished for the past many years. Let me close with some of His words that resonate with me tonight - I trust they would deeply resonate with Liza - perhaps they will with you as well. 

My heart is in anguish within me, and the terrors of death have fallen upon me. Fear and trembling come upon me, and horror has overwhelmed me. I said, "Oh, that I had wings like a dove! I would fly away and be at rest. Behold, I would wander far away, I would lodge in the wilderness. I would hasten to my place of refuge from the stormy wind and tempest"...
As for me, I shall call upon God, and the LORD will save me. Evening and morning and at noon, I will complain and murmur, and He will hear my voice. He will redeem my soul in peace from the battle which is against me...
God will hear and answer... The one who sits enthroned from of old - with whom there is no change.
Psalm 55

For all who are with us in this fight, and for all in their own fight - Let Your face shine upon us and give us peace. We trust only in You, Our Father. 

Posted on